Collie Dog - The Companion

March 31st, 2009 by admin

The Collie dog makes an excellent sporting dog, and can be taught to do the work of the Pointer and the Setter, as well as that of the Water Spaniel and the Retriever. He can be trained to perform the duties of other breeds. He is clever at hunting, having an excellent nose, is a good vermin-killer, and a most faithful watch, guard, and companion.

Little is known with certainty of the origin of the Collie, but his cunning and his outward appearance would seem to indicate a relationship with the wild dog. Buffon was of opinion that he was the true dog of nature, the stock and model of the whole canine species. He considered the Sheepdog superior in instinct and intelligence to all other breeds, and that, with a character in which education has comparatively little share, he is the only animal born perfectly trained for the service of man.

At the shows this type of dog is invariably at the top of the class. He is considered the most tractable, and is certainly the most agile. Second to this type in favour is the smooth-coated variety, a very hard, useful dog, well adapted for hill work and usually very fleet of foot. He is not so sweet in temper as the black and white, and is slow to make friends. There is not a more graceful and physically beautiful dog to be seen than the show Collie of the present period. Produced from the old working type, he is now practically a distinct breed.

The skull should be flat, moderately wide between the ears, and gradually tapering towards the eyes. There should only be a slight depression at stop. The width of skull necessarily depends upon combined length of skull and muzzle, and the whole must be considered in connection with the size of the dog. The cheek should not be full or prominent.

The muzzle should be of fair length, tapering to the nose, and must not show weakness or be snipy or lippy. Whatever the colour of the dog may be, the nose must be black. The teeth should be of good size, sound and level, very slight unevenness is permissible. The jaws Clean cut and powerful. The eyes are a very important feature, and give expression to the dog; they should be of medium size, set somewhat obliquely, of almond shape, and of a brown colour except in the case of merles, when the eyes are frequently (one or both) blue and white or china, expression full of intelligence, with a quick alert look when listening. The ears should be small and moderately wide at the base, and placed not too close together but on the top of the skull and not on the side of the head. When in repose they should be usually carried thrown back, but when on the alert brought forward and carried semi-erect, with tips slightly drooping in attitude of listening.

The neck should be muscular, powerful and of fair length, and somewhat arched. The body should be strong, with well sprung ribs, chest deep, fairly broad behind the shoulders, which should be sloped, loins very powerful. The dog should be straight in front. The fore-legs should be straight and muscular, neither in nor out at elbows, with a fair amount of bone; the forearm somewhat fleshy, the pasterns showing flexibility without weakness. The hind-legs should be muscular at the thighs, clean and sinewy below the hocks, with well bent stifles. The feet should be oval in shape, soles well padded, and the toes arched and close together.

In general character he is a lithe active dog, his deep chest showing lung power, his neck strength, his sloping shoulders and well bent hocks indicating speed, and his expression high intelligence. He should be a fair length on the leg, giving him more of a racy than a cloddy appearance. In a few words, a Collie should show endurance, activity, and intelligence, with free and true action. In height dogs should be 22 ins. to 24 ins. at the shoulders, bitches 20 ins. to 22 ins. The weight for dogs is 45 to 65 lbs., bitches 40 to 55 lbs. The smooth collie only differs from the rough in its coat, which should be hard, dense and quite smooth.

John Pawlett
http://www.articlesbase.com/pets-articles/collie-dog-the-companion-91584.html

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You Don’t Need to be Celebrity to Have a Wedding Planner!

March 29th, 2009 by admin

Every woman’s dream is to meet the perfect partner and have a perfect wedding. With an average wedding costing approximately £20,000, planning a wedding now requires the professional expertise of a wedding planner. Brides and grooms are far too busy earning the money to be able to actually organize such a mega event. Hence the need for a professional wedding planner.

However, not any old event planner will do. No bride or groom is going to hand over the planning of the most important day of their life to just anybody.

Weddings are an emotional event that must be dealt with sensitively.

In addition to all the arrangements, meetings, schedules and finances to handle, there are also ruffled feathers to smooth.

The wedding planner is thus more than just a hired hand; they liaise between the bride and groom’s families. They must balance the flaring temper of the bride’s father with the unreasonable demands of the groom’s mother as well as the sensitive emotions of the bride’s mother.

If that wasn’t confusing enough, the wedding planner is often called upon to act as judge and jury on debates raging within the family itself, and has to guide them on the proper wedding etiquette.

Weddings are no longer the simple affairs they were in the past. They have become lavish events geared to celebrate the couple’s union.

Brides enjoy nothing more than the chance to plan and enjoy their fairytale wedding and spend the day being Cinderella.

Grooms who traditionally took a back seat when it came to wedding planning have now started seeing it as an opportunity to be the gracious host.

Is it any wonder then that weddings have taken on a larger than life dimension and require considerable time, effort and money to organize?

Any couple that approaches a wedding planner are looking to take away a lot of their worries away from them: a wedding planner can assist in the following ways:

- to prepare a Wedding Plan (schedule)

- step by step wedding planner list of all the tasks involved in planning a wedding

- picking the perfect wedding invitation cards

- Prepare a wedding budget

- provide advice for planning the wedding ceremony

- Selecting the wedding date

- Choosing where the wedding will take place

- Finding a wedding officiant

- Selecting wedding ceremony music

- obtaining the marriage licence

- The wedding ceremony rehearsal

- Planning the wedding reception

- Choosing the time of day

- Choosing a Theme and place

- working with the venue staff to create a fabulous

- Wedding reception activities (receiving line, speeches, first dance, bouquet toss, cake cutting, etc)

- arranging the details on the tables from name seating cards to favours and right down to cutlery placement.

On any first meeting, it is vital that the wedding planner comes across as being professional, in control and level-headed. Why not first present your business cards to them, containing all contact details, they just might keep it and hire your services.

In our busy society, an increasing number of couples need to hire a wedding planner to plan their special day.

According to the Association of Bridal Consultants, the percentage of couples using wedding planners has doubled in the past three years, from seven percent to 15 percent.

With more than 2.5 million weddings taking place in the US alone in 2006, there are more opportunities to become a wedding planner than ever before.

Whenever a couple marries someone is needed to oversee all the details to ensure the wedding is a success.

Improve your Sales, Business Cards, Leaflets

CME
http://www.articlesbase.com/business-articles/you-dont-need-to-be-celebrity-to-have-a-wedding-planner-91702.html

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What the longest temper tantrum you've ever seen a kiddo throw?

March 29th, 2009 by admin

The kid I watch threw one that lasted over an hour! All over some stupid envelopes and a dang rubberband!!!!

my Nene has only thrown two temper tantrums… both in public… once at a CFA playscape…when i told him it was time to go…he threw himself on the floor…i walked away from him…five seconds later he came running after… the other time at wendy's… he was agged that we ordered his food incorrectly… cryin', talkin loud and actin' a fool… i sat with him out in the car for twenty minutes while his mother finished eating…

Posted in temper tantrum : 9 Comments »

How to Ask for a Raise: 9 Powerful Tips

March 27th, 2009 by admin

Here we go.. hope these tips will help:

Raise Your Salary Tip 1: Make sure you deserve a salary raise. And learn how to prove it. Write down your skills and your accomplishments. Is there anything really unique about you or the service you offer to your employer? Write it down. Make sure you know everything about your contributions to the company.

Raise Your Salary Tip 2: Do you know what’s the normal salary raise for someone like you? Seek that information. Learn everything about the salary range in your area of expertise. Ask co-workers or other people who do the same job. What is their salary?

Raise Your Salary Tip 3: Timing matters especially when you are about to ask for a raise. The idea is to choose the right time and the right place to give it a go. Does your supervisor looks happy today? Is he/she in a bad mood? Is he/she ready to listen to you? Is he/she ready to pay attention to what you have to say?. Your boss is just another human being and you don’t want to ask for a raise when he/she is in a bad mood.

Raise Your Salary Tip 4: You know there are days when you feel you really worked hard. This always reflects to everybody in your working environment. There are days when you accomplish a difficult task or you finish a project you where preparing for months. Don’t you think that day would be the best to ask for a raise?

Raise Your Salary Tip 5: Your boss will probably start a bargain with you. He/She wants to spend as little as possible and make a deal for less. It would be a good idea to ask for an amount of money that is a little bit higher than what you expect or deserve. If you feel deserving a 10% salary raise, ask for 15%.

Raise Your Salary Tip 6: Don’t just think about yourself or what you have to offer. Be realistic. Is your company going through some hard times lately? Prepare yourself for a salary raise that’s lower than you expected. Or wait some time until the company is wealthier.

Raise Your Salary Tip 7: Use your negotiating skills. Your supervisor may offer you a more flexible schedule, or a vacation time or some time off, instead of raising your salary. Be prepared for every possible option. Maybe a more flexible schedule is what you wanted after all.

Raise Your Salary Tip 8: Don’t be shellfish. Your boss may turn you down for any reason. Do you have a plan B? If not, then create one. Regroup and get ready for action. Don’t lose your temper or you’ll lose it all. Most importantly, don’t lose your sense of humor!

Raise Your Salary Tip 9: Don’t quit. If you got turned down don’t be disappointed. You need to insist. You need to try again and again. Meanwhile, keep improving your strategy. Try a better or different approach next time. If you want a salary raise you can get it easier if you keep believing.

Mary Markella
http://www.articlesbase.com/careers-articles/how-to-ask-for-a-raise-9-powerful-tips-89047.html

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Spa and Resort Management Career Guide to Making it in the Spa Industry

March 25th, 2009 by admin

Just because spas offer its customers full relaxation and respite from the daily stress and hustle and bustle of the metropolis, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the people working behind it are on Zen mode 24 hours a day, seven days a week. In fact, managing a spa or taking on a spa career comes with as many guidelines and technicalities as the average Windows operating system. While it may seem odd that we compare something deemed stress-relieving to something a little stress-inducing, this is the reality. A spa is considered a place for rest, but this only applies to the customer. For the people behind it, a spa is busy one-way street.

If you’re thinking about entering the spa world and taking on a career as an aesthetician, therapist, manager, or whatever, do not be disheartened just yet. Sure, while it’s true that running a spa is quite stressful, it can also be very rewarding.

A Growing Industry

Statistics shows that the job opportunities in the spa industry are among the fastest growing in the world. This is not a surprise especially with the rising population, growing consumer demand for physical excellence and beauty and quadrupling personal incomes all over the world. This is what globalization has done to most industries and, luckily, the spa world is among those that are likely to reap the greatest benefits.

It is for this reason that a lot of people are entering training programs to become manicurists, massage therapists, cosmetologists, barbers, electrologist, skin care specialists, and the like. Schools offering such courses are popping up everywhere, each offering a distinct style that when put together have only one thing in mind, that is, customer satisfaction. A spa’s greatest goal is to make each one of its clients happy when they step out. A spa is every distressed urban jungle hound’s wonderland and nirvana.

Easing the Worry Out

As mentioned, a spa’s goal is provide pampering. Thus, if you are seeking a career in this industry, you must also have this goal in mind. Sure, while the job opportunities in this industry is growing at an alarming rate, you must also know what you’re getting into and, at least, enjoy what you’re doing. For how can you ensure complete customer satisfaction when you yourself are not having fun in the process?

You see, working in a spa entails a job that entails touch and personal interaction with the client. Hence, a sunny or at least serene disposition is required of people who hold spa-related jobs. When customers go to a spa, they expect to be treated like royalty and positive energy. That’s why even if you’ve had a huge fight with your significant other right before you went to work, this should never reflect on how you perform your job.

Indeed, it is probably safe to say that spa employees are the best actors in the business industry, next to sales people, because their work requires them to temper their feelings and set aside their personal lives while they’re doing their jobs. As an effective spa therapist, you must be able to ward off the negative and wear the positive while you’re on your shift. This is quite challenging. However, if you do want to succeed and thrive in this industry, you should be prepared to do this once in a while. Otherwise, don’t have this job at all.

Service is Key

If you love what you’re doing, it will be easier for you to become good at it when the time comes. While money is key motivator to performing well, it should not be the only reason why you’d want to work in a spa. You can channel all your negative energy into taking additional spa-related courses and, instead, challenging this negativity by trying to advance in the field. For instance, if you’re the resident hairdresser, you might want to vent your frustration by enrolling in advanced hairstyling classes to further your career.

The key is to channel all your doubts into something that’s productive and constructive, and toward something that would help you grow further in your chosen field. This is not exclusive to spa careers, though, as you should practice this with any situation in your life.

The sooner you decide that you want a career in the spa industry, the better, because you will get an early headstart in terms of training and getting the right mindset. Just because working in a spa entails working in a quiet environment that doesn’t seem to have known conflict during its lifetime, it doesn’t mean you have to scrimp on the preparations. Again, because the spa industry is turning global faster than you can say, well, ‘global’, you must learn to ride with the times and get all the training you can get your hands on.

Of course, as with any career, you should know what you’re getting into before you ‘decide’ that a certain job is right for you. A spa career is no walk in the park. It will stress you out. However, if you find that this is your calling, that you are meant to be in the service industry, then you should exercise all means possible to get it done and done well.

If you need more advice on whether a spa career is perfect for you, assess your personality first or seek the advice of a career counsellor. You never know what’s best unless you take an outside looking in approach to your career options. Or you could go visit a nearby spa and observe how its staff and crew operate, and note how well they keep their composures and energy despite the entire day’s backbreaking work load. After that, if you still think that you’re fit for the job, then by all means, go for it.

Josh Stone
http://www.articlesbase.com/careers-articles/spa-and-resort-management-career-guide-to-making-it-in-the-spa-industry-87515.html

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Sunk Costs and Loss Aversion

March 23rd, 2009 by admin

Sunk costs are usually defined as previously incurred costs that are not recoverable and should not be taken into account in decision making. Here is a slightly modified example of a sunk cost from Jerold Zimmerman’s “Accounting for Decision Making and Control” (Irwin McGraw-Hill):

Example. Abadabba Berman, the comptroller of the Schultz Cement Shoe Company, has contracted with Microstiff to design a proprietary accounting software package for the company at a cost of $15,000. After months of dealing with countless glitches and bugs the system just barely works. Finally one of the frustrated bookkeepers points out to Abadabba that for only $2,000 they could purchase an off the shelf package from Quickcrooks that would generate all the reports that the more expensive system provides with a fraction of the aggravations and crashes. Abadabba cannot bring himself to invest the additional $2,000 in the replacement system even though the company will easily save that much and more in the improved productivity of the accounting department. Abaddaba reasons that they have too much invested in the old accounting system to simply abandon it.

Abaddaba should consider the past investment in the expensive Microstiff software a sunk cost. He should ignore the past investment in deciding whether to abandon the software and replace it with the Quickcrooks package. According to cost accounting theory the only relevant costs to consider are the future costs associated with each option. If retaining the Microstiff software is more expensive going forward than buying the Quickcrooks package then the Microstiff software should be abandoned. The previous heavy investment in Microstiff should not be a consideration in making his decision.

Loss Aversion: Why Abaddaba Won’t Let Go of Microstiff

According to cost accounting theory Abaddaba’s choice to hold on to Microstiff is irrational. The best choice for the company is to abandon the software, not keep it. Now of course, the irrational choice for the company may be a very rational choice for Abaddaba personally. Why? Because the boss of the company, Dutch Schultz, has a notoriously bad temper and Abaddaba does not want to face Dutch’s wrath when he tells him that he made a $15,000 mistake going with Microstiff. So from Abaddaba’s perspective it is rational to cover his rear and stick with the bad software.

But this is not really the full story because even if Abaddaba was the owner of the firm the odds are that he would still make the irrational choice to stick with the crummy software. Why? Because he, like all of us, tends to be very reluctant to accept losses. Abaddaba’s failure to treat the prior investment as irrelevant is a species of a very common behavioral trait known as loss avoidance.

Varieties of Loss Aversion

For most people losses loom larger than gains. The pain we feel from a loss generally outweighs the pleasure we feel from a comparable gain. This is what the social scientists term loss aversion. Variations of loss aversions are common place in business and investing. For example, investors are, as a rule, much quicker to realize gains than losses. This is the reason why automatic stop loss orders are implemented when buying stock. An automatic stop loss triggers a sale when a stock investment’s price drops to a certain point. It is automatic and commonly used because it is the all too human trait of loss aversion that often keeps people from cutting their losses. The tendency is for people to hold on to losers in the hopes that the loss will reverse.

Real World Decisions

In the above example all the consequences of the different courses of action were specified. I told you what the dollar consequences of keeping the old software versus buying new software would be. Rarely in real world situations do we have precise dollar estimates for the results of different courses of action. The tendency to stick with losers, and thus not cut our losses, can be reinforced by the ambiguity surrounding real world decisions. If you are in a position of being emotionally invested in a bad decision, the tendency will be for you to filter out and skew data that would support abandoning the course of action you are invested in.

Practical Advice on Dealing with Sunk Costs and Loss Aversion

First recognize that there is no way to detach yourself emotionally from the consequences of important decisions that you have made. Recognizing that you have made a poor important decision is always going to be painful. What you can do is recognize that you have an emotional investment in your decisions and seek the advice of individuals who are not so emotionally invested. These individuals are less likely to filter out information that might call for abandoning a bad investment.

So who can you consult with about important decisions? If you are a small business owner it is important to have an outside advisor. Outside accountants, Small Business Extension Center staff, or volunteers from S.C.O.R.E are all good possibilities that will not break your budget. Trade or business associations often have staff available for advice on business operations. Also do not overlook the web as a possible resource of good advice. Almost every type of industry or business has forums where similarly situated owners can offer each other advice.

For larger businesses, independent boards of directors can fulfill the role of detached advisors as well as outside consulting specialists. Also remember loss aversion and the unwillingness to abandon sunk costs can exhibit itself in groups as well as individuals.

Finally, do not forget that even the smartest people make mistakes and often very big ones. Ignoring non-recoverable costs requires admitting that we have made bad decisions. Never an easy thing to do. But the ability to admit mistakes, abandon sunk costs and move on is vital to success in any enterprise.

Michael Sack Elmaleh
http://www.articlesbase.com/management-articles/sunk-costs-and-loss-aversion-154984.html

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What To Expect From Your Listing Agent

March 23rd, 2009 by admin

A good listing agent really serves 3 purposes. They market and advocate, they organize and schedule and finally they negotiate and protect. In general, a listing agent really earns their money. In fact, I have always felt it is much more work to list than to sell. But, for most professionals it is good to have a balance of listings and buying clientele.

So when you list your property with an agent what marketing services can you expect? Well, the listing agent should get the property photographed and posted on the Multiple Listing Service quickly. A sign is still a very useful tool and should be posted within days. Newspaper and real estate publications take more time to arrange with print schedules. But, your agent should have made arrangements for at least one printed ad. On South Padre, an agencies web presence is a crucial sales tool as most of our buyers are distance purchasers. A posting and description on their website should be achieved quickly for maximum response. Other sites like Realtor.com are available to those agents with realtor designations and make powerful sales tools.

Once the word is out on your property the agent takes on a new role. They must arrange for showings with clients who have inquired about a listing and allow other agents access. This is easily achieved with a lockbox but, more of a challenge for owners who live in the home or have pets, or renters, etc. The agent must also obtain answers to questions and know every little detail so that it can be rapidly conveyed to interested parties or other agents. It is the listing agents responsibility to gather accurate facts should an unusual question arise.

Once a contract comes in the listing agent is responsible for mediation and fair play between parties. There is a protocol that is to be followed when multiple offers are made to ensure that all involved are fairly represented. The listing agent must make an unbiased presentation of all contracts for the owner to choose from. When a contract is being negotiated, the listing agent is the advocate for the owner. They must be trusted to handle conflicts and make requests with the sellers interests in mind. Agents who lose their temper, act slowly or are unpleasant to their fellow agents will only bring disagreement and stress to a deal. Deals are saved or lost by the agents ability to mediate and problem solve. When a contract is negotiated and in title the agent still continues to work. They must supply information like the sellers disclosure, survey, and condo declarations within a timely fashion. Then they must work closely with the title company to ensure that all aspects of the deal are progressing. It is not unusual to find a listing agent struggling to obtain a lost survey, provide comps for appraisers, or diligently following up with a slow financing institution.

A good listing agent is a powerful ally that can make selling your property a lot less stressful. Take your time in choosing one that offers the best services and makes you comfortable. You may be spending a lot of phone time together and must trust them with your property.

Wendy Hauschildt
http://www.articlesbase.com/real-estate-articles/what-to-expect-from-your-listing-agent-127659.html

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Is it always good to control your temper?

March 22nd, 2009 by admin

I lose my temper when I'm stressful. Most of the time, I feel I'm busy and I feel that people are wasting my time.

I lose my temper a lot especially when im annoyed about something and it is kind of a problem.

You can't keep your feelings bottled up, but at times you can release it. Just try not to do it constantly towards others.

There is probably a med or something to reduce temper or something, im not sure lol. I need it!

Posted in temper : 9 Comments »

Is it That Time of the Month for Her?

March 21st, 2009 by admin

You know its coming; it happens every month without fail. And what happens depends on the girl. It could be crying, fits of anger, yelling, pizza consumption or chocolate obsession. Regardless, you’ll have to agree that it is in your best interest to keep your head down, figure it out and take it like a man. PMS (Pre Menstrual Syndrome)- inflicted women have been given license to run amok, and survival should be your main goal. There are ways to make it easier on the both of you — the focus needs to be on reducing her irritation and discomfort.

Don’t point out her PMS symptoms

Women can be touchy about being labelled as a raving lunatic for a few days a month, and very few will admit that they’re affected. If you notice her behavior getting out of control and you feel the need to mention it, just don’t blame the PMS. Assuming that her behavior is strictly due to her raging hormones, it will discount the possibility that her feelings are valid, and will therefore only make her angrier. You might consider yourself to be a pretty funny guy, and some women do provide plenty of fodder for entertaining comments when under the influence of PMS. Save the commentary for your buddies, well out of earshot of the lady in question. The last thing you should ever do is make jokes about her symptoms, whether its acne, an attitude reminiscent of Adolf Hitler, or eating binges. It’s best to pretend like nothing is any different than usual.

Don’t drop any surprises

Your girlfriend is bound to be a bit moody at the very least, and possibly depressed or anxious, so the last thing you want do is spring any kind of surprise on her. This can include any big news that can wait for a better time when she can give it her full attention with a sane mind and without the impact of her period. In fact, you better expand the big-news category to include any questions or problems that would require her to make grand decisions.

Obviously, small gifts and simple treats don’t fall into the particular category of surprises that need to be avoided; a thoughtful bouquet of flowers or her favourite meal will make an even bigger impression than usual if she already feels a bit emotional.

What you should be more concerned with is those surprises that can’t automatically be taken positively. For example, while you may have had many conversations about how to decorate the spare room and have thrown around some ideas, you may not want to go ahead and surprise her with a full-blown renovation or impromptu decoration if there’s any possibility that it isn’t exactly what she imagined. Likewise, big purchases that she should be included in, like that brand new 57″ plasma TV, might be a bit more than she can handle right now, and her temper might win out over your sincere gesture. It’s best to discuss things with her in advance during the best of times, so don’t skip that step when she’s even more likely to overreact.

Reduce social activities

Feeling bloated, sore and uncomfortable doesn’t make for an enchanting evening, so don’t be surprised if your lady doesn’t live up to her usual social butterfly standards around this time of the month. It’s always a good idea to check with her before confirming social plans that include her, and it’s even more vital when her body and hormones have a mind of their own.

Subhash
http://www.articlesbase.com/self-help-articles/is-it-that-time-of-the-month-for-her-164519.html

Posted in temper control : 6 Comments »

Parenting With Consequences not With Punishment

March 21st, 2009 by admin

Parenting in the modern age can be a particularly daunting task. We are constantly being told that smacking a child is not appropriate and that punishment in general is not effective parenting. However, punishment and consequences are not necessarily the same and is definitely a positive way of disciplining your children. A proper form of discipline teaches the child to become a responsible adult with self-discipline and consideration for other people.

Consequences, when used correctly, encourage good behaviour and help to keep the lines of communication open between parent and child. However, it is not enough to use negative consequences solely in teaching children to behave appropriately as this only teaches them what not to do rather than teaching them more appropriate behaviours. It is also necessary to use positive consequences for good behaviour as well as being open and honest with your children as to what you expect of them.

When you focus on the good behaviours and praise the children for these behaviours, the bad behaviours generally decrease and negative consequences are needed less often. Remember that consequences are only there to apply boundaries and reinforce rules when verbal reminders haven’t worked.

It is important to think carefully about the type of negative consequences used for bad behaviour as overuse or inconsistency can render them ineffective.

There are three types of consequences and these will each be explained in the following paragraphs. The three types are natural consequences, logical consequences, and loss of privileges. Each of these can be used as required, depending on the behaviours displayed by the child.

Natural consequences can teach your child lessons without your intervention. However, these can be either good or bad. An appropriate natural consequence may be where a child refuses to eat a meal. The child will then feel hungry and will learn quickly that refusing to eat is not appropriate and leads to personal discomfort.

In a bad sense however, the consequence of behaviour may lead to injury in which case it is important for the parent to intervene in order to protect the child. Also, natural consequences can actually reward bad behaviour. For instance, a bully is rewarded when the victim gives in to demands.

A logical consequence is one that is in relation to the behaviour displayed. An example of this would be where the child throws food or drink on the wall or floor in temper. When the behaviour has subsided, the child would then be expected to clean up the mess. This form of consequence gets the child to think about what they have done and the consequence of their actions. These consequences are fairer as they are relevant to the particular behaviour.

Loss of privilege may be used as a negative consequence for some behaviours such as swearing and aggressive behaviour and may range from losing the privilege of watching a television program to not being taken on an outing.

The use of time-out is appropriate when the child is being particularly difficult or where both parent and child are feeling angry and need a short break to calm down in order to address the situation more appropriately.

Although negative consequences are an important tool for parenting, it is important to be aware that encouragement for good behaviour will lead to less need for these consequences. To bring about this situation, children need to understand exactly what is expected of them. Obviously, if the child then ignores rules and subsequent reminders, then negative consequences need to be applied. However, these need to be consistent and must apply to all children in the family regardless of age and gender. Otherwise, the child will see it as favouritism toward other children and this may lead to a diminished sense of self worth.

Also, keep the consequence short in order to give the child a chance to try again. Don’t take the toy away for hours…take it away for fifteen minutes or so. The consequence does not have to be long or harsh for it to work.

It is also important to implement the consequence calmly and without getting personal. Refer to the bad behaviour not to the bad child. Remaining neutral and in control lets the child learn from the situation rather than worrying about how angry the parent is with them.

All children display negative behaviours at times. How you deal with these behaviours as a parent can make all the difference in maintaining that close bond with the children. Don’t confuse negative consequences with punishment and use the negative consequences in a constructive manner. Happy Parenting!!!

Annabelle Rox
http://www.articlesbase.com/communication-articles/parenting-with-consequences-not-with-punishment-136985.html

Posted in temper : 14 Comments »

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